Thirty years ago I had a conversation with a woman that changed my life and made me question my self worth. She told me to do something that made me realize something amazing about my self esteem. I’ll come back to her shortly.
Your self esteem has a massive impact on everything you do. It effects the types of relationships you have, both in business and your personal life. It directly relates to the amount of money you can earn or how much money you get to keep. This is because we each place a value on ourselves and make a judgement on who and what we are, based on our past experiences. It’s all about what we think we deserve.
Your level of deserving can be changed if you understand how your subconscious mind stores and processes information. Your self belief imposes it’s self on your day to day life. It influences the thousands of minute decisions you make everyday and eventually your outside world reflects what you have internally. That’s why you hear stories of lotto winners that end up with nothing a few years later.
Back to the woman. This woman said to me “Look into a mirror, straight into your own eyes and say the following aloud; Aymen, I love you and I accept you just the way you are”
I thought “big deal” (that’s sarcasm) and continued on, thinking nothing more about it. Later that day as I left her and jumped into my car, for some strange reason I remembered what she said. As I was driving along the freeway I tilted the rear view mirror toward me, looked straight into it and said – nothing.
I couldn’t say it. It took all the will power I could muster before I managed a weak whisper “Aymen, I love you and I accept you just the way you are”
I noticed that all I could do was whisper the words even though I was alone in the car. I recognized the fact that I couldn’t say this loudly, immediately and understood the power of what this woman had given me.
Over the months that followed I worked on this and before long I was confident in verbalizing this statement aloud to myself. Now as a Life Coach I have given this technique to many of my clients. I have been amazed at what great results such a simple technique can have. Each client starting at a different point and finishing with a greater love of themselves. By watching the thoughts that come up as you say the words in this amazing statement you are armed with an insight into your own internal world and what area’s you need to work on.
This technique affirms to you – that there is nothing wrong with you. You need to understand that you are NOT;
- Your past actions.
- What others have told you – you are.
- Any less than someone you compare yourself with.
You are complete the way you are and you offer to the world a unique perspective and way of being that no one else can offer.
The Self Esteem Impact On Your Wealth
Just a few months ago I spoke to a salesman who was suffering in silence, grappling with issues of self worth. His sales were low and he had yet to see the link between his opinion of himself and his earning capacity. I gave him this exercise and he was unable to do it for the first few sessions I had with him. Slowly over time he allowed himself to love. He grew to increase his acceptance of himself and he relaxed the negative beliefs he had about himself. Needless to say his sales increased.
Working with small business owners over the years has shown me similar outcomes. We may start with my “5 ways to dramatically increase the money coming into your business” but we usually end with exercises that enhance the internal image of the business owner. It’s their own self worth that dictates the amount of money that comes in.
In my life over the years I have studied this closely pushing up the amount of money I can generate until I see that have reached capacity. Then working on why I can’t go any further. Delving into my own opinion of myself and understanding what limiting beliefs are hidden in the dark corners of my sub conscious mind. You can do this too it only takes effort but the reward in wealth is incredible. In this context I use the word wealth to incorporate more than just money. I am typing this with one eye looking out to my beautiful garden and watching my children play. I am thinking of the fantastic people I am privileged to have in my life and the love that surrounds me. You can have all this too.
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Authors Details: Aymen Fares is an International Life Coach with clients all over the world. He is based in Melbourne Australia for personal appointments or you can benefit from coaching via Skype anywhere in the world.